A wedding is rumored to be one of the most stressful experiences known to man. Apparently it's the only time when the difference between thick stripes and thin stripes on serviettes, and the difference between this font and this font can be the be all and end all of the universe.
Not for us. The secret is easy. Just don't give yourself the time to worry about these things, ie a month, and get married in Australia, the country that read the book "living for dummies" and decided to instill it as an institution.
Some dates:
11 December 2008 - Arrival in Sydney from Thailand with the surprising news that we are engaged
13 December 2008 - A quick search on the internet to look into the paperwork required by Germany and Australia for a marriage.
14 December 2008- Finish reading the list of German requirements. Time taken: approximately 23 hours.
14 December 2008- Finish reading requirements in Australia. Time taken: approximately 4 minutes. Float the idea with my fiancé that we could at least check out this possibility with the relevant authority.
15 December 2008- Monday-
- 10am After breakfast I called the celebrant Tony Thorrington just to ask if it would be possible to get married before the 20th January 09.
- 6pm we are sitting in his office signing the "intention of marriage" documents for a wedding on the 18th of January. Documents required: Bride-passport, groom- birth certificate and cash.
We decide on a ceremony at my hometown beach and he gives us some things to help us write a ceremony and organise the wedding.
- 7:30pm we break the news that we will be getting married.
- 7:32pm we open a bottle of champagne.
-----from then the dates are a bit unclear-------
Things that are clear are:
1) the paperwork is simplified in Australia. It is apparently more difficult (and expensive) when it comes to getting a spouse visa later. In Germany it's the opposite. The marriage is difficult (and expensive) and the visa is easy.
2) Australia has 20393049400 people who know about weddings and the Somersby Wedding Estate has freaking everything.
3) Venues in Australia are easy to find and almost all have some type of wedding catering/venue service.
4) Friends and family want to help you and can make things soooooo easy. Cake, Make up, Photos, Music, Security, Setting up, invitations, Decorating and design, lending out a house, driving,,,you name it our nearest and dearest where there to help. This made the whole day so much more closer and personal.
5) Time constraints make the decision making process so much easier. Invitations look good: send them now, Flower girl likes pink: she gets pink, Too hot for suits: don't wear one, Someone likes fish: serve fish, party must be finished by 11: start party earlier, and so on.
18 Janaury 2009-
Perfect summer day for a ceremony at Terrigal Haven with friends and (Australian) family and reception. The sky is blue, the music is ready, the flags are waving in the background, my friends and family are there, some people couldn't make it there on such short notice, onlookers gather from surrounding picnics to watch the wedding. One friend managed to make the journey from Germany.
The limousine arrives. Moby's "porcelain" starts. The waves lap. People start whispering "the brides here" and find a place to stand or sit. I stand with my back to the ocean and my brother and 2 oldest friends by my side. My nephews walk down the aisle looking a bit overwhelmed, little Sienna forgetting that the "Flowergirl" is supposed to throw flowers. It's ok. Annette, my sister in law cum bridesmaid walks down alone and takes her place on the left. All is fine. Then bang,,,I see Anne walking towards me accompanied by my dad. She is smiling. Well more like grinning as if somebody dropped some wicked drugs in her coffee. I realise I have the same dumb grin. The celebrant starts: "Ladies and Gentleman.....".... Time stands still. Time blacks out. Yes. Yes.
Now we are kissing. People are clapping and we sign the register. People are taking photos and wishing us congratulations. We drink a bottle of champagne between us on the way to the reception. We eat. All the speeches are incredibly poignant and touching. I get lost in the moment in my speech and speak too long.Uhh, it's my wedding, I can. I play the Anne song on guitar. We dance. We drink. We smile. We exhale. We find a bottle of champagne on ice at our wedding night villa (ie the Bed and Breakfast from across the street) . We take out the champagne and fill our glasses with...the ice and water. We breathe out. We breathe back in. We still have the dumb grins on our faces.
The day was huge but so short at the same time.
A wedding is like anything: it's what you make and expect of it. I looked at it as a day to have those near and dear to you all together, where you can announce "we think we are cool together", and celebrate that.
Luckily for us, we got to experience this twice. Both a different experience in itself but both just as distinct. The one regret was that the distance of our home countries didn't allow Anne's family, my Brother in America, and many friends around the world to be there. So the idea of a second wedding in Germany was never even a question but a formality. But the story of the Wedding part 2: Berlin Kesselhaus is for another time.
The marriage after a wedding is simply another name for relationship. Our relationship itself has barely changed. We are still happy about the same things as before, we still fight about the same things as before. People don't change. Perceptions and expectations may change but that happens with or without marriage. So you just make the best of it and enjoy the good as it comes.
And we are.
Keine Kommentare:
Kommentar veröffentlichen